How Favoring One Child Over Another Can Destroy The Whole Family – 6 Tricks Every Parent Must Know.

By on April 30, 2013

A new research carried out recently by Dr Jennifer Jenkins of the University Of Toronto reveals that when parents favor one child over another, all the children in the family are affected. Strongly favoring one child over the other can increase the risk of mental problems for all the children in the family, in most cases the favored child suffers more.

Although the research was based on over 400 Canadian families, it is applicable to basically every average family as it analyses different parenting system and how the children and family are affected as a whole. In all 400 families used for the research, all the children within each family were aged between two and five.

However only few parents have not been accused of favoring one child over another thus it implies that out of every 10 family over 8 parents are guilty of child favourism.

Below are some amazing tips to bear in mind and habits that should also be avoided.

  • Avoid comparing one child with another for example : your brother always gets an A in Maths.
  • Endeavor to make some time for each child and their individual interests.
  • Let each child know they are special in their own way and make each child feel loved equally.
  • Setting some ground rules which are applicable to all example; no name calling, no slamming, no fighting.
  •  Having fun as a family – playing board games, watching a film together are peaceful ways the whole family can spend time together.
  • Endeavor to celebrate your child’s individual achievement; an A in Chemistry should be celebrated just as much as a fabulous piece of poetry.

Implementing the above tips on daily basis can help build trust and love among the children. Although there will be occasions where one child quarrels with the other and might probably lead to fighting, in the event of this, parents should bear in mind always that some one will always be at fault and it takes two to fight thus both children should be scolded and punished equally.

It was further revealed that mothers who were single parents, poorly paid or had a history of abuse were more likely to treat their children differently compared with those whose lives were less stressful. This type of stress increases mental problems in children such as emotional problems, aggression and attention.

In all likelihood, differential parenting sets up a dynamic that is very divisive‘ said the leader of the study – Dr Jennifer Jenkins.

Over 80 percent of parents have been found guilty of favoring one child over the other, what do you have to say about this? Have you also been a victim of child favor-ism even if you are the favorite one

Please share your experience and opinions by leaving a comment below and if there is any suggestion you wish to add to the six stated above, please leave it as a comment below and we shall include it in the post as we continue to review it… Share your thoughts!

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  1. Bako Yila

    August 2, 2013 at 11:43 pm

    Never say to the child he can’t amount to anything or i wish you were a male or female (as the case maybe).

    Children will behave just the way the parent treat them. this article is a wake up call for all parents and aspiring parent.

  2. Ademola Popoola

    October 14, 2013 at 10:11 am

    Nice article. The point is, you have to love your children the way they are and help to bring the best out of them. Note it is a conscious thing you have to do and do it patiently.

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